Dear Future Brother-in-Law...

   This post is an early birthday gift to my twin sister Heather, and one day it will be a wedding gift to her very lucky husband...


Dear Future Brother-in-Law,

    I've been expecting you. If you're reading this, then you've been selected for the grand prize, and it's got a lifetime warranty. You are now the proud owner of my sister's heart, and soon you'll be united as man and wife. Now before you claim your prize, I figured that the person who knows her best (that would be me!) should give you a few words of wisdom. Think of it as your instruction manual for all things Heather. Feel free to use this as a reference and come back to me if you need more advice. Here we go...

   First off, let me be the first to remind you that you are without a doubt the luckiest guy on the planet right now. You're gaining an amazing wife and joining a wonderful family (not to mention you're getting the world's best sister-in-law!) You're about to have a fantastic wedding, which I'm sure Heather will make into the event of the century, and one day you'll be blessed with beautiful children. With a catch like Heather, you're pretty much set for forever (no rhyme intended), and if you're anything like me that means you have many years of constantly being cared for ahead of you. Needless to say, this is the happiest time of your life, and I know it's the happiest time of hers. She has waited for you and prayed for every aspect of your life, that you would be a hard worker, a good daddy to her children, and most importantly that you would share her passion for the Lord. (She also wanted you to love music like she does and to be easy on the eyes, which I'm sure you've got covered.) Even as I'm writing this, she loves you with all her heart,  though she sometimes wonders if you'll ever make an appearance. I don't know if she'll change any before you meet her, if the Heather I know now is different than the one you'll know in the future, but I do know for sure that no matter what, she'll be an incredible person. And if you're good enough to meet her standards, you're probably pretty incredible, too. As Heather's husband, you've landed the gig of your life (see what I did with the music pun?) She's probably written a million songs about you, and if you can carry a tune you'll definitely be singing with her. But even if you have a little stage fright it'll be well worth it to have her as your singing partner. You'll be like Troy and Gabriella (extra points with the sister-in-law if you know High School Musical!)

    As with all great prizes, there are a few precautions you'll have to take. I'm sure you know this by now, but deep inside the tiny little body of your bride-to-be is a ball of fire and passion that, if ignited, will spew like a volcano. No matter what happens, remember that the source of that passion is intense love and caring for everything she does. She's one of those rare people who wholeheartedly throws herself into the simplest of tasks, who just cares so much about every little thing that sometimes she has built-up stress that has to come out. As her husband, you are to be the spiritual leader of your family, and I have confidence that you will calm her fears and provide her with peace better than anyone but God Himself. Know that even though she can be a handful at times, the intensity of her love for you will be like nothing you've ever experienced. Never forget to tell her you love her, and hold her close to you to quiet her spirit when she feels stressed. And when you argue, never let a day go by without letting go of your anger. Because take it from me, no matter how many times she says, "I'm never talking to you again," she always gets over it in five minutes or less. Like I said before, she already loves you now, so imagine how much she will when she actually knows who you are. I can't stress this enough: you, my future friend, are an incredibly lucky man! Remember it every day of your life.

    The last thing I have to say is this: please take care of her because she's my favorite person ever and I want her to be happy more than anything else in the world. As her twin, I've prepared her for you by being a constant companion. In a way, I guess you could say I'm the "other man". Many of Heather's first Cinderella moments happened long ago in our room when we played princess and I slow danced with her as her dashing prince ("because the prince is always taller than the princess, Hope!") Yep, I've done my part over the years, mostly by testing her patience, to ensure that she is the best wife you could ever dream of (you can thank me later.) And now, she is yours and you are hers and you're both going to live happily ever after. Enjoy your grand prize and thank God for her every day. Love you like a brother (in-law!)
Your favorite sister Hope

(P.S; Keep in mind that we'll be spending a lot of time together. In other words, you hurt her, I'll hurt you :) But I'm sure we'll be the best of friends!)
 

The Day After...

    As all of you know, yesterday was Mother's Day. For a full 24 hours, people all over the country gave gifts, made food, and honored their moms for being some of the most important people in their lives. Maybe your family did something special, took your mom out for dinner or a movie. Maybe like my family you went to visit relatives and brought gifts for all the moms that were there. Maybe you even lived out every busy mother's dream and just had a relaxing day at home. Whatever you did, you did it for the all the important women in your life. But chances are, after the festivities were over things went right back to normal. And today, the day after Mother's Day, you may treat your mom like she isn't anything special. Like she just exists to do things for you and doesn't deserve to have more than one day devoted to her. Now I know you may be thinking that the person I just described isn't anything like you, that you're nowhere near that selfish. But sometimes in the things we don't say, we can make our mothers feel like they are not appreciated for the sacrifices they make every single day in order to do what's best for the people they love. 

    I have to be honest and say that a lot of the time I'm guilty of under-valuing and under-appreciating my mom in the things that I neglect to say and do for her. I get so wrapped up in my own little world that I forget to thank her for working so hard to make my life the best it can possibly be. She brought me into the world, taught me how to love others with my whole heart, gave me the tools I need to speak for myself and to defend those who need my help. She even taught me how to drive (and believe me, that was a VERY long and tiring process!) Because of her, I know that God loves me and has a plan for my life, and from following her example, I know that with His help I can have the patience to live my life with a listening heart. One day, if it's a part of God's plan (and I really hope it is), she will continue to guide me so that I can be a good wife and mama just like she is. And I'm sure if I took a poll of everyone who reads this, the majority of you would say what I've said and then some about your own mothers. Because God made our moms to be the most important and influential people in our lives. He selected them to be the ones to mold us into the people we're meant to be and created us to grow inside of them the first 9 months of our lives in order to strengthen the bond between mother and child. And even though we don't always show it in the way we treat them, we are eternally indebted to our moms for everything they've done for us and everything we've done to them. The existence of moms is living proof that we have a God who really does care for each and every person on earth. Now, remember what I said at the beginning of this post about giving gifts, making food, and doing special things for our moms on Mother's Day? Well, if you really think about it, moms are such a vital example to their kids that the special things we do for them on Mother's Day are really just the things that they do for us every day! And not only are moms good examples to their own kids, they're good examples for everyone around them! There are lots of women in my life who are not related to me by blood--from the ladies at my church, to many of my friends' moms--whom I know I can depend on, people I love who have had a positive influence on my life.

  

   When God created the role of "mother", He made a model of true love that points us to His unfailing love for us. And whether or not God gives a woman children, He calls us all to live out that role in the lives of the people around us. Take joy in the calling that God has given us as women because, in an eternal sense, it is the most important job a person can have. We are called to shape the people of the world, to nurture and care for God's children both in body and in spirit. If you're reading this and you're a new mom, realize that you've been given the ultimate responsibility, to hold your child's soul in your hands as you prepare them to one day give it to Christ on their own. If your child is grown, remember that no matter what happens they will always need your love and support. And if for some reason God has decided not to give you children for the time being, take hope in the fact that you are called to be a caregiver to all who need you and remember that God's work in you is never complete. Thank you all for the amazing things you do for God's children. Even though it can be hard, He knew that y'all were definitely the right people for the job He has given you. Happy Day After Mother's Day!

     

     

Finding Your Purpose

    It's finally May, and with that comes things to look forward to. My 17th birthday (well, ours. I'm a twin!), the beginning of summer, and, of course, the end of school. Right now, I have a lot of different things going on in my head. As usual, I'm excited for the summer to start, ready for a break in my hectic schedule. But this year is a little different. This is the summer before my senior year, and the pressure is on to finalize my plans for not only college, but the rest of my life. Now, I know I'm being a little dramatic. I don't necessarily have to be ready for everything life throws at me. But for the first time ever, I have to think about things that will significantly affect my future. And I have to be honest, it's a little scary. If you're in the same boat that I am, you get what I mean. I'm just as much a "too independent teenager" as the next person, but I'm not too sure I'm ready to be an adult just yet. I mean, I'm not the most organized person, and most of the time I'm kind of scatterbrained. Do I have what it takes to be in control of my own life? Can I stay focused on my goals and work hard to be the person God wants me to be? Some days it feels like my mind is filled with never-ending questions that my unorganized self just can't seem to sort out. And a lot of the time I end up just pushing the inevitable to the back of my mind.

    If you haven't already noticed, growing up is a hard thing to do. We leave everything that is familiar and venture off into the great unknown to pursue what God has called us to do. But what if we aren't sure what we're supposed to be in life? What if you're like me and you have a hard time narrowing down your interests into a sure and steady calling? I know it's not a bad thing to have lots of interests, but when it comes to picking a major it can make you feel lost. And what about the financial aspect? The money for college has to come from somewhere. I don't know about you, but the pressure of a new identity and a list of life-changing decisions is enough to bring this normally stress-free girl to her wit's end. In the blink of an eye, my tough choices just changed from, "What color popsicle do you want?", to, "How do you want to spend the rest of your life?" And, much to my dismay, my normal happy-go-lucky thought process just isn't going to cut it. To someone who doesn't know God, this is the end of the line. They thrive solely on the human instinct that in order to live a successful life, one must do everything on their own, making each lasting decision based on their own interests. But I'm going to be completely open here and say that I don't want to live like that. If it were up to me to make all the decisions and I had no God to help me figure it out, I would have a pretty messed up life. Because I'm not perfect. I have flaws that cloud my judgment, and for the most part I'm not mature enough to control my life. If I'm so clumsy that I can barely take a key out of a door, then surely I'm not capable of holding the key to my life's destiny. In short, in terms of controlling my future, I'm really not the person for the job. But I don't have to be.

Jeremiah 29:11 says, " 'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord. 'Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." This has always been one of my favorite verses, and not just because it has my name in it. I love the fact that it reminds me that I'm not in this alone after all. Because maybe I haven't figured it all out, but He has. He created everything, including you and me, for a reason that fits perfectly into His divine plans. He selected my major for me before He created the world, and with His help everything worthwhile will eventually fall into place. And He knows your purpose, too, because He gave it to you. He created you and said, "This is my treasured child whom I have given many gifts. No matter what happens in life, no matter how lost this child feels or how the world tries to tear down what I have made, I have an amazing plan for this special creation. And if I am welcome, I will work wonders in this new life and use it for my glory. Because my love is everlasting, and my child will never be alone or without purpose. I am here for my creation, and I will always be here. I am eternal." If you haven't already, please accept God into your life and let Him work wonders in you. He wants so desperately to save you, to guide you through your life, and to give you a purpose for His kingdom. And if you have accepted Him but you're feeling like your life has no meaning or purpose, just know that it's never too late for God to work in you. Whether you're graduating high school or your life is nearing its end, no matter where you are in your journey on this earth, God has a purpose and a plan for you. All you have to do is trust Him enough to find it.